June 2012
5 tags
Odin Allfather: God of Parenting
Odin: Now, young children of mine, here's all the reasons why frost giants are evil, nasty, terrible creatures who don't deserve to live. Not even a little bit.
Thor: Cool! I'm gonna kill them all when I grow up to be king!
Loki: Me too!
Odin: You guys rock. By the way, I'm not going to tell you flat-out that Thor gets the throne - let's just say you were both born to be kings. Yes. Seems best.
- LATER ON -
Loki: Jesus Christ, Thor is just fucking shit up left right and center.
Thor: LOOOOL HAMMER WAR THUMP WEE!
Loki: Good thing we're equals, and all. Both born kings, and all. BOTH ASGARDIANS, AND ALL.
Friends of Thor: Shut up, Loki, you're just jealous and want Thor's throne.
Loki: ...I kind of never said that.
Loki: By the way, can anyone tell me why I'm blue?
- SO AFTER THOR GETS SENT TO EARTH -
Odin: Son, you're adopted.
Loki: WHAT.
Odin: Also you're a frost giant.
Loki: WHAT.
Odin: Of course, I may have raised you to hate frost giants...
Loki: WHY DID YOU KIDNAP ME AND PRETEND I WASN'T A DIFFERENT SPECIES?
Odin: Um, political reasons.
Loki: SO WHEN YOU SAID WE'D BOTH BE KINGS...
Odin: I meant of a frosty, nasty planet you've only been to once while trying to attack your, um, cousins.
Loki:
Odin: Not that that'll ever happen, now that Thor's gone and fucked shit up.
Loki:
Odin: So you don't really have a use, now, and you're not even really Asgardian, so...
Loki:
Odin: Yeah. Probably should have told you sooner, eh?
Loki: YOU-
Odin: Odinsleep!
Loki: GODDAMMIT.
Loki: YOU'RE THE WORST DAD EVER, YOU KNOW THAT.
Loki: SHIT YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY DAD.
Loki: YOU PROBABLY KILLED MY DAD.
Loki: GOD.
Jun 6th
4,388 notes
4 tags
another thing i do not get about thor
teaparty-at-221b: lokii—laufeyson: when they were hanging off the bridge, why was odin only holding thor’s foot with one hand?!?! uhm they gave you another hand to use AND MAYBE PULL THEM BOTH UP BEFORE YOUR SON LETS GO?!?!? idk odin. idk.
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So I was looking up the origin of the surname... →
odinsmightymustache: consultingtimelordofmischief: mybelovedcheshire: justicemuffins: Go ahead and scroll down to the motto portion. Wow. WOW. THANKS A LOT INTERNET RFJELRKJF WHY TEARS. THERE ARE TEARS. nO That just isn’t fair.
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Listenpay-you-well-for-darwins-hide: valerieparker: ...
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